The older I’m getting I’m realizing cliche phrases are true. When people say things like, “the grass is greener on the other side” or “you are what you think,” it’s all real— I’ve been really digesting the fact that my life is largely defined by my perception of it. And so the value of documenting my thoughts has become irreplaceable, as it shows me how I live.
Keeping my eyes on my own paper
You don’t realize who you are until you are put in a certain circumstances and it’s really an active effort to sit and observe how you’ve reacted. I’m always surprised by how my thoughts look on paper. Every experience has taught me something and journalling my life experiences has done so many things for me. One of them being that it allows me to focus on how I view myself, and what is happening, instead of from the lens of society or those around us.
Being the one who is defining what is happening to me has helped me gain confidence. It makes me realize this is my story, and mine alone. I am here, I am alive, my flaws and all are unique to me, and I have a right to create and to flourish despite them. It is a great way to nourish that intimacy with life and internal validation with ourselves.
The loss of intimacy with ourselves can really suck the joy out of life. It is important to sometimes keep ideas to yourself, laugh with yourself. Some thoughts are best left messy, incoherent, and un-performative in nature. Some dreams should only be fought for by the person who thought of them. These things, to me, is what makes this life worth living.
When I look back in my journal I just think, wow, I’m really out here on this earth. It makes me want to paint.
The race to improvement
How self aware can I get? How better can I get at juicing out the gems from my experiences? How grateful can I be? It’s kind of crazy there’s an endless amount of possibilities and there are people who are so much better than me at it.
I’ve been enjoying Mike Tyson’s podcast right now for this reason. You get a glimpse of someone who reached peak success in their career, who climbed the mountain and came back down. He’s reached almost a zen-like state and it is really interesting hearing his thoughts on life. You should check it out if you get the chance. His humility is inspiring.
I love hearing everyones thoughts about themselves and life experiences, no matter the format. It teaches me a lot, especially trailblazers like him.
All in all,
I’ve been enjoying learning who I am. I don’t journal everyday but I do it enough to “update” myself on what is going on in my head. This is one of my favourite hobbies because it is only once I began understanding myself, is when I began to understand God, this life, and the people around me.
How well do you think you know yourself? How often do you like to journal? What do you love about it? Share with me a thought or two!
next post: friday, Oct 16th, inshallah